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me when listening to chandelier by sia


(via tyrabankruptcy)


If ur about to cum early u gotta slow the stroke down. If ur goin 70 mph u needa chill and school zone the pussy. U gotta start thinkin about anything and everything but her vagina. Think about that holographic mewtwo card you got in 5th grade. Pussy needs to be the last thing on your mind. We gotta do better

(Source: adampacmanjones, via mexicanprophet)

My beautician and my hairdresser have both rang this week to see when I’m booking them to come out 😔 u know ur getting sloppy when ur hairdresser rings up to check on u.


the day u go out looking a mess is the day u see the hottest people by tia valentine

(via tightvaginas)

interview in roughly 2 and a half hours, i should prolly put my bong down now

lying ass bitch (via ecartum)

(Source: squidwurd, via reginasmom)

oh sorry I didn’t get that text

everytime i shop i end up buying slightly different black dresses.

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